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A love story that was never told — until now.

The speech was written. It was never given.

 

For two months, he wrote and rewrote it — carefully chosen words to thank the three most important men in his life, including the dominant he had come to love. On the night of his fifty-fifth birthday, surrounded by friends in a Berlin restaurant, he stayed silent. Too afraid that speaking honestly would push the man he loved further away. 

 

A month later, the relationship ended over the phone. No reason. No explanation. Three years — gone in a sentence.

 

The speech that was never given sits at the heart of this book.

What this book is

The true story, told as a novel, of a three-year connection between two men — a dominant with steady hands and a masochist who could take a hundred strokes and still ask for more. 

 

From an Berlin hotel lobby to the playrooms of Amsterdam, to a fortified house on a Mediterranean island. It ends where love stories often do — with one person still inside it and the other already walking away.

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What makes this book different

  • Not just BDSM — but emotional reality.
  • Not just desire — but vulnerability.
  • Not just connection — but loss.

This is not an erotic novel, though the scenes are vivid and unflinching.

This is a novel about honesty, surrender, trust, and what happens when a connection built on controlled pain accidentally grows into something neither man had agreed to.

For readers of every orientation

Most BDSM novels are written for readers already inside the scene. This one isn't. You don't need to know the vocabulary of whips, floggers, or safe words to understand what happens in these pages. The specifics may be unfamiliar. The emotions won't be.

If you’ve ever:

  • Loved someone deeply
  • Lost without closure
  • Held back words that mattered

The dungeons are the backdrop.

The story is love.

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What you’ll receive

  • 300+ pages of honest storytelling
  • 14 Chapters across multiple countries
  • The speech that was never given — finally told
  • A novel that stays with you

A note before you buy:

This book contains vivid descriptions of BDSM scenes — including bondage, impact play, and more.

 

We strongly recommend reading the free first chapter before purchasing, so you know exactly what you're getting into.

 

If you need a safe word while reading — feel free to pick one. We suggest "bookmark."

 

Read the First Chapter